{"id":2230,"date":"2023-03-08T15:11:38","date_gmt":"2023-03-08T20:11:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/?p=2230"},"modified":"2023-05-08T18:37:28","modified_gmt":"2023-05-08T22:37:28","slug":"how-to-help-a-new-mom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/how-to-help-a-new-mom\/","title":{"rendered":"20+ Things You Can Do To Help A New Mother"},"content":{"rendered":"

Welcoming a new baby into your life is one of the most intense experiences any woman can go through. And, as they say, it really\u00a0does<\/em>\u00a0take a village to raise a child\u2026or, more specifically, to support parents while they raise their child. So, what can you do as a member of that village to pitch in? We\u2019ve outlined over 20 super easy tasks that\u2019ll elevate you to Friend of the Year status in no time\u2014including helping new parents by delivering must-have\u00a0postpartum essentials<\/a>\u00a0and other needs. New moms (and dads), we suggest you email this sucker around, tweet it out, or post it on your Facebook wall\u2026and let it do the talking for you.<\/p>\n

1.\u00a0Drop off food<\/strong>. New parents are way too busy (and exhausted) to ponder what they\u2019re going to eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Help them out by dropping a meal on the doorstep, text that the grub is there (don\u2019t ring the doorbell), and be prepared to go along with your day. If you get to see the baby or parents, bonus! Don\u2019t worry, your normal hangout sessions will continue after a few months.<\/p>\n

2.\u00a0Organize others to drop off food.<\/strong>\u00a0Mealtrain.com<\/a>\u00a0is a fantastic and easy way for a bunch of friends to pitch in and make sure the new parents are being fed during those hectic early days and months. The leader of the mealtrain can provide participants with a list of favorite foods, restaurants to order from (and specific orders), and grocery store staples. Look to get the new mama and papa a combination of healthy meals (including homemade options), one-hand snacks (who has two hands these days?!), and a few indulgent choices in there, too. (Sure, she might be on an eventual quest to loose those\u00a0baby pounds, but no one\u00a0doesn\u2019t<\/em>\u00a0want freshly baked\u00a0chocolate-chip cookies.)<\/p>\n

3.\u00a0Offer to run some errands\u00a0for<\/em>\u00a0her.<\/strong>\u00a0Does she need unglamorous stuff like nursing pads and diapers? Offer to grab it for her. Is her car low on gas? Fill it up for her. Also, if you find yourself near her neighborhood, a quick text to see if she needs anything is always appreciated. If you\u2019re too busy, think about hiring her a\u00a0TaskRabbit<\/a>.<\/p>\n

4.\u00a0Offer to run some errands\u00a0with<\/em>\u00a0her.<\/strong>\u00a0That\u2019s right, some moms would rather pour over\u00a0all of the nipple cream possibilities instead of having a friend take their\u00a0best guess. In these cases, offer to scoop the mom and baby up, and tend to the kid while your friend tries on nursing bras at Target or finds whatever else she might need.<\/p>\n

5.\u00a0Mind the conversation.<\/strong>\u00a0While your new mom friend is still essentially the same person, she\u2019s had a bit of a priority shift. Just be mindful that she might be more interested in discussing breastfeeding, diaper rash, sleep training, and other baby minutia\u00a0for the first few months than your personal issues. Although, perhaps talking about the happenings in your life might feel like a welcome escape for her, just feel it out. And try not to take offense if it\u2019s the former scenario.<\/p>\n

6.\u00a0Ask what you can do to be helpful.<\/strong>\u00a0If the mom can\u2019t come up with anything, look around the house and suggest some stuff. Can you fold some laundry? Wipe down the bathroom counter? Empty and refill the dishwasher? (Just please don\u2019t ask her where every dish goes. Try to figure it out yourself.) If you\u2019re not into cleaning and are feeling especially generous, offer to pay a housecleaner for an hour.<\/p>\n

7.\u00a0Help her figure out her new contraptions.<\/strong>\u00a0Baby stuff can be complicated. Sometimes it requires watching YouTube videos and reading instruction manuals, all while trying to shush a wailing baby. With that in mind, ask the new mom if she needs help figuring out any of these new products, from a baby sling to a bouncer.<\/p>\n

8.\u00a0Pamper her.<\/strong>\u00a0Trust, her body is all kinds of effed-up after having a baby (and now carrying it around all day long). Either offer to babysit so that mom can get a massage, haircut, or mani\/pedi. Or, if she\u2019d rather keep the baby close, offer to take her to the venue and watch the baby while she\u2019s getting primped or rubbed down.<\/p>\n

9.\u00a0Don\u2019t stay too long.<\/strong>\u00a0(Unless you\u2019re watching the baby while mom sleeps\u2026then stay forever!) But, seriously, keeping a long, coherent conversation and having a high-quality hang sesh with a new mom is probably not happening these days. Don\u2019t take it personally. It\u2019s just temporary. She still loves you, she just doesn\u2019t have the bandwidth to socialize like she used to.<\/p>\n

10.\u00a0Take the big kids off her hands.<\/strong>\u00a0If your new mom friend already has another kid, offer to entertain the oldest one(s) and let mom and dad spend some solo time with the newest addition.<\/p>\n

11.\u00a0Help with the Thank You notes.<\/strong>\u00a0Oh Thank You notes. They\u2019re the bane of every new mom\u2019s existence. She\u2019s likely received a million gifts and kind gestures, and she\u2019s likely way behind on formally sharing her appreciation for them. First things first, tell the new mom that she doesn\u2019t need to send you a Thank You note. It\u2019s a huge relief. Then ask her if she needs help with the others. Maybe she\u00a0needs stamps stuck on envelopes? Or addresses scrawled on the front? Maybe you\u00a0can help her figure out an e-card alternative? Or maybe you can just hold the baby while she is finishing them up herself.<\/p>\n

12.\u00a0Wash your hands before holding the baby (without mom having to ask).\u00a0<\/strong>Also, don\u2019t necessarily expect to hold the baby when you visit. A lot of new parents are super germ-conscious, and rightfully so.<\/p>\n

13.\u00a0Get her out of the house.<\/strong>\u00a0And plan the nearby, totally manageable, baby-friendly adventure yourself (she probably doesn\u2019t have the bandwidth). Keep it short and simple. It can even be a walk around the neighborhood. She\u2019ll appreciate a change in setting.<\/p>\n

14.\u00a0Document the new family.<\/strong>\u00a0It\u2019s all too often that there are lots of pictures of mom holding the baby or dad holding the baby, but rarely of the two partners together. How about offering to grab a fancy camera (or an\u00a0iPhone) and snap some family pics? If you can hold the baby for a second while mom can slap on some lipstick, that\u2019s also appreciated.<\/p>\n

15.\u00a0Don\u2019t freak out when the baby cries.<\/strong>\u00a0New babies cry. It\u2019s just what they do. It\u2019s something that the new mom (and her friends) just need to accept. Getting all flustered about it and asking 20 questions as to why it\u2019s happening is just going to fan the flames on the situation. Stay calm and let mom figure it out.<\/p>\n

16.\u00a0Ask if she has a to-do list she needs some help with.<\/strong>\u00a0Everything from buying pacifiers\u00a0to calling a lactation consultant\u00a0is\u00a0something you can help her tackle while you\u2019re there, either by holding the baby while she handles things, or just doing them for her.<\/p>\n

17.\u00a0Offer to do a night shift or two.<\/strong>\u00a0That is,\u00a0if everyone is comfortable enough with the arrangement.\u00a0Delivering the baby into mom\u2019s arms for nursing or feeding the baby a bottle during the night is an incredibly\u00a0kind gesture.<\/p>\n

18.\u00a0Load up her Netflix and DVR with good shows.<\/strong>\u00a0Feeding a newborn every couple of hours\u00a0leads to lots of TV time. Make sure she has choices other than\u00a0Reba\u00a0<\/em>reruns.<\/p>\n

19.\u00a0When in doubt, bring diapers.<\/strong>\u00a0One can never have enough diapers. Or wipes. Just ask what size is appropriate first.<\/p>\n

20.\u00a0Shower her and the baby with compliments.<\/strong>\u00a0Seriously\u2026have you\u00a0ever<\/em>\u00a0seen a baby this cute?! Or a mama this glow-y?!<\/p>\n

21.\u00a0Don\u2019t just focus on the baby.<\/strong>\u00a0With the attention\u00a0of everyone so squarely on the baby, sometimes the amazingness of the new mom gets lost in the shuffle. Gifting her with a great pair of button-down PJ\u2019s, a bouquet of flowers, or throwing her a low-key potluck with her best girlfriends can all help her feel appreciated and special.<\/p>\n

22.\u00a0Keep the help comin\u2019.<\/strong>\u00a0Even though it gets easier as time goes on, motherhood is\u00a0never really\u00a0that<\/em>\u00a0easy. So, even when the newborn stage is over, the help of friends (and pretty much all of the tasks above) are still really incredible. She\u2014and good karma\u2014will eventually pay you back.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Welcoming a new baby into your life is one of the most intense experiences any woman can go through. And, as they say, it really\u00a0does\u00a0take a village to raise a child\u2026or, more specifically, to support parents while they raise their child. So, what can you do as a member of that village to pitch in?…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":2464,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[138,75],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2230"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2230"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2230\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":154328,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2230\/revisions\/154328"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2464"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2230"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2230"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mothermag.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2230"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}